Hope in the Midst of Loss
Today is Good Friday, a day marked with loss and grief, as we read the gospel accounts in the Bible. I used to wonder why this day was called “Good” Friday.
And yet, there is a message of hope, resilience and new life embedded in it - a message that can resonate deeply with your personal journey of grief recovery.
I will tie this blog to the RESET grief recovery method:
REFLECT - Acknowledge the Reality of Loss, and Christ’s Sacrifice
Think back to that day, the original Good Friday. Imagine how the disciples were feeling. Their leader Jesus had been betrayed by one of their own, and been crucified. Their loss was real, it was brutal, and seemingly final.
In a similar way, the reality of your own loss is undeniable. You have lost the familiar presence of your special person, the dreams you shared with them, the everyday activities you shared with them.
Acknowledging this new reality, the empty space where your husband once stood, is a crucial first step in your journey, just like the disciples had to confront the devastating reality of Jesus’ death.
As we remember the agony of Jesus on the cross, and the huge sacrifice He made, can we also acknowledge the immense love that fueled that sacrifice? He willingly endured suffering, not for Himself but for us.
In your grief, it can be easy to feel abandoned or forgotten. But Good Friday reminds us that even in the darkest pain and loss, love can endure.
Take a moment today to reflect not only on the pain of your loss, but also on the love that you shared, and the unwavering love of God that surrounds you still. Perhaps you may want to take some time for quiet reflection, or to write in your journal about your thoughts and feelings, both about your personal loss and the events of Good Friday.
EMBRACE - Accept and Process Emotions, Through Christ’s Example
The emotions that accompany grief are varied - sadness, anger, confusion, loneliness, fear. There is no right or wrong way to feel, and each wave of emotion deserves to be acknowledged.
Consider how Jesus must have felt on the cross. Betrayed by a friend, abandoned by His followers, the physical agony, the spiritual weight of the sins of the world. “My God, my God, why have You forsaken me?” (Matthew 27:46), expresses the feelings of isolation and despair that often accompany grief.
Just as Jesus embraced His suffering, feeling the full weight of the experience, we too must allow ourselves to feel our grief. Resisting these emotions can hinder our healing process.
Instead, bring these feelings to God. He understands heartbreak. In prayer, share your sadness, your anger and your confusion. Find comfort in knowing He holds your tears and understands your pain.
SHAPE - Rebuild Your Identity In Light of the Cross
The loss of a spouse can deeply impact a woman’s sense of personal identity. So much of life has been intertwined with your spouse, and after losing them, you may find yourself wondering, “Who am I now?”
The disciples, after the crucifixion, must have wrestled with a similar crisis of identity. Their leader was gone, their purpose seemed to have disappeared.
But the story did not end on Good Friday. Jesus’ sacrifice, though being a moment of profound loss, ultimately reshaped history and offered a new spiritual identity to all who believe in Him.
Your core identity remains wrapped in Christ. You are a beloved child of God, strengthened by His amazing love. This is a time to depend more deeply on your spiritual connection. To find comfort and strength in prayer, Bible reading and your relationship with Jesus. He knows grief. Allow God to be the anchor of your renewed identity.
EXPLORE - Seek New Purpose, In Resurrection Hope
The darkness of Good Friday was eclipsed by the dawn of Resurrection Sunday. Jesus Christ’s resurrection from the dead is the ultimate symbol of hope, new beginnings and life after death.
While your earthly relationship with your husband has changed, the promise of eternal life through Christ offers profound hope for the future.
As you navigate your grief, allow the resurrection to inspire you to explore new avenues of purpose. Fresh ways to contribute your unique gifts and talents to those around you. This will not replace the love you had, but it will give new meaning to your future. Perhaps you can volunteer, pursue a passion, deepen connections with family and friends, or find new ways to serve at church or in your community.
Just as the disciples found new purpose in spreading the message about the resurrected Jesus, allow God to guide you toward a new sense of meaning in this new chapter of your life.
THRIVE - Sustain Growth and Momentum Through God’s Grace
The journey of grief recovery is not linear. It has its ups and downs. There will be days that feel like Good Friday all over again, and there will be moments of unexpected grace and healing that remind you of Easter morning.
Sustaining your growth and momentum requires continual reliance on God’s Grace, patience with yourself, and connection with your supporters.
Just like the disciples continued to grow in their faith and understanding after the resurrection, allow yourself time to heal and evolve. Lean on the support of your Christian friends, seek help from your pastors and spiritual mentors, and above all, trust in God’s unfailing love and provision.
Thriving after loss is not about forgetting where you have come from, but about integrating your experience into a life filled with renewed purpose and hope.
Conclusion
This good Friday, find comfort in knowing you are not alone in your pain. Just as hope emerged from the darkness of that day, hope, healing and fresh purpose can emerge in your life too.
Reflection - Download our free guided journal prompts for reflection and prayer as you navigate this day in your grief journey.
May you find peace and comfort.
Sincerely,
Gerry van der Wende
www.advancelifetransformation.com
P.S. Click here to download our free guided journal prompts.
