It's a question as old as time. There isn't always a simple answer, a neat package to tie up the mystery of suffering. But within the Bible, we find threads of understanding, not to erase the pain, but to help us navigate it.
One thing the Bible makes clear is that God didn't create suffering. He created a perfect world. But sin entered that world, and with it, pain and death. We live in a fallen world, and sometimes, pain is simply a consequence of that brokenness.
Think of it this way: if you drop a vase, it shatters. That's not the fault of the one who made the vase; it's the result of gravity and the vase's fragility. In a similar way, some suffering comes from living in a world where things break.
But that doesn't fully satisfy the question, does it? What about the pain that seems so focused and personal? The loss of a spouse, a devastating diagnosis, the ache of loneliness? Where is God in that?
The Bible offers several perspectives:
Suffering can reveal our need for a Savior. Pain exposes our vulnerability. It reminds us that we aren't in control, that we need someone beyond ourselves. In our weakness, we find our strength in Him.
Suffering can produce endurance and character. Romans 5:3-5 tells us that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. Like a muscle that grows stronger under resistance, our faith can grow deeper and stronger through trials.
Suffering can teach us compassion. When we've known pain, we can better understand the pain of others. We can "weep with those who weep" (Romans 12:15) not just with our words, but with our hearts.
Suffering can draw us closer to Christ. Jesus himself suffered. He knows our pain. When we suffer, we share in His suffering, and can find a deeper connection with Him.
God can bring good out of suffering. This doesn't mean the suffering itself is good, but that God can use even the darkest experiences to bring about good in our lives and the lives of others. Romans 8:28 reminds us that God works all things together for the good of those who love him.
For those of us who are grieving, particularly widows, these words may sometimes feel hollow. Grief is a unique and agonizing journey. It can sometimes feel as though God has abandoned us. But He hasn't. He promises to be near to the brokenhearted (Psalm 34:18). He is the "God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles" (2 Corinthians 1:3-4).
Here are some actions to take to cope with your pain, and to find God in the midst of it:
Acknowledge your pain. Don't try to suppress it or pretend it doesn't exist. Be honest with yourself and with God about how you're feeling. Pour out your heart to Him. He can deal with your anger, your sadness, your confusion.
Immerse yourself in God's Word. The Bible is full of stories of people who suffered, and how God met them in their suffering. Find scriptures that speak to your situation. The Psalms, in particular, offer words of comfort, lament, and hope.
Connect with other believers. Don't isolate yourself. Find a community of faith where you can be supported and encouraged. Share your burdens with others, and allow them to share theirs with you.
Practice prayer and meditation. Spend time in quiet reflection, seeking God's presence. Ask Him for comfort, for guidance, for strength. Listen for His still, small voice.
Look for ways to serve others. It may seem counterintuitive when you're hurting, but focusing on the needs of others can actually bring healing and purpose to your own life. Use your experience to comfort and encourage those who are going through similar struggles.
